The Avilla Family's own....

Adoption Adventure

Here is something I wrote during our trip in early 1997 to a friend who was preparing to travel soon to the same city to adopt a child. I hope it helps you create an image and an expectation of what your trip can be like.

Letter To A Friend

If you were my best friend and I knew I wouldn't offend you by telling you what I really thought, I would say:

Don't compare America to Russia in conversation, it only distances you from your friends here.

Realize that your child is one of many here. The orphanage folks will do everything they can to make it pleasant for you, but you are not the center of the universe.

Be patient about getting information. You will be here long enough to get everything you want.

Take initiative to relate to those around you and take an interest in them. I look at it this way: I don't have to worry about food, paying bills, driving, scheduling and coordinating. What's left? - love your child and reach out in kindness to the people that have given their lives to care for her, and to people that will be supporting your effort to give her a better life.

Last, and probably my most important encouragement - You have probably been waiting for months to hold your child and play and create bonding. So have we. And you will have the rest of your life to do that. You only have a few days to get to know the caregivers, your child's playmates, and to leave a deposit of goodwill in the hearts of these folks. Look for ways to serve at the orphanage, spend time with your child in their playgroup and touch their friends and love on them, too. You will get to see your child interact with her peers - invaluable stuff. Ask to be there at lunchtime (get ready to be amazed at how much these kids eat!) Then help pickup the cups and dishes. It only takes a moment, but shows the workers you are grateful. You will find they are very cordial to let you come into the room at any time. Maybe ask to take the Christmas decorations down during nap time, or read a book to the kids in the afternoon (in English?, maybe not...). Do you get the picture? When we have focused on serving rather than being served, doors of goodwill are just swinging open. I think many people may have the idea to "get the kid and get out of Dodge" so they can start their new life together. Hey, this IS their life! It's part of their eternal history. Why not find out as much as you can about what life was like so you can tell her when she's 16 and wondering where she came from?

I wanted to share some personal insights with you because you are going to be following in our exact footsteps and I would really like for you to experience the same joy and wonderment, satisfaction and contentment of doing good in this situation. These folks deserve us to be at our very best. YOU can create your own - Adventure of a Lifetime, With Consequences for Eternity!!!

The Adventure of a Lifetime with consequences for eternity starts with one step for your family, too!...


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